Anger Management For Dummies summary

Do you ever feel your anger suddenly overcoming you like a rogue wave? Well, you might need to pay closer attention to your body. That’s because every sudden wave of anger is preceded by subtle physical cues; controlling your anger begins when you learn to identify those cues.

Just moments before you’re overcome by a fit of rage, your body sends you signals that let you know it’s coming: you start breathing faster, blushing, sweating and tensing up your jaw and hands.

Annoying things happen every day – people are rude to you, your car breaks down, maybe your beloved cat throws up all over your favorite carpet. These are all perfect opportunities to get into the unhealthy habit of brooding.

Brooding breeds anger, and an irritating mishap can easily trigger an unstoppable wave of rage if you think about it too much. For instance, say your cat did vomit on your rug.

Unless you’re a hermit, there’s always going to be somebody who’ll try to pick a fight with you. But you have a choice – you don’t have to lash out in return. It’s completely up to you to deal with the provocations of others without losing your cool, getting into a shouting match, or worse.

That’s because it takes two parties to fight and even if someone provokes you incessantly, hostilities can only break out if you play along. Say your teenager is trying to draw you into an argument to let off some of her angst: She comes home from school upset, responds to your loving welcome with a sneer and slams the door to her room, telling you to leave her alone.

What do you frequently say during an angry outburst? Something about telling people to back off, or a warning that you’re running out of patience? In that case, it’s likely that your anger is caused by stress, a serious situation that needs to be addressed.

But first, a bit more about stress.

Everyone knows how cranky kids get when they don’t have enough sleep, and, if you’re lucky, they’ll be merely grumpy. In the worst case scenario, they’ll throw a violent temper tantrum. So, how does this relate to anger management as an adult?

Well, as a grown-up, you likely won’t throw yourself on the floor screaming, but sleep deprivation will still increase your irritability. Getting too little rest might set you up for an irate outburst. People generally feel a lot better if their brains are well-rested. After all, a good night’s sleep lets you see the world with clarity and optimism.